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Thoughts on Being a Sister

Quotes by J. R. Miller.

A Sister with a Purpose

Introduction
      We feel inadequate.

      Two stories   
                  "The Sister With No Purpose"
                  "The Sister With a Purpose"
Girls, we are either the first or second sister. There's no way around it. Which one do you want to be?  Being a sister isn't a choice, but what kind of Sister we are IS.

Our goal in life shouldn't be to be a good sister. Our goal in life is to glorify God. Each day. In the ways He wants to be glorified in us. Whatever that may mean for you, whatever that may mean for me. And we need to invest our lives, hearts and thoughts WHOLEHEARTEDLY into WHATEVER God may be calling us to THIS day, THIS moment.

·        To glorify God, we have to obey Him. He's set us in families for a reason. Therefore, if we are in a home with siblings today, God's will (at least in part) is to point them to Himself. We cannot deny this. It takes trust, courage and great patience to quietly fill that small space He's given us to fill.
·        When we are obedient to the calling God has given us, He also makes a way for our other desires to be fulfilled (other interests, etc).

The Sister With No Purpose






The Sister With a Purpose






Loving our siblings is knowing what makes THEM feel loved. Customized love. For example . . . TESTIMONY HERE.




My goal is that they may be encouraged in heart and united in love, so that they may have the full riches of complete understanding, in order that they may know the mystery of God, namely, Christ,  in whom are hidden all the treasures of wisdom and knowledge.


The outgrowth of our relationship with our siblings should be: 

·        Encouragement
·        Unity in Love
·        Greater Understanding into the Mystery of Christ.

Phrasing it differently, we might say that, in a healthy, Christ-focused relationship with our siblings, we will each be mutually:

Encouraged in heart

United in Love

and Grow in the Full Riches of Complete Understanding.

This fruit cannot and will not be produced in our lives if we are not


Col 2:7
Col 2:18 & 19








The Imperfect Sister
The Purpose Driven Sister
Communicating with humility
Taking interest




1) What's so great about being a sister?
  • What is our goal in life? It's not all about getting married; it's living for and throwing ourselves WHOLEHEARTEDLY into WHATEVER God may be calling us to THIS day, THIS moment. Being prepared for the future is the result, not the goal.  After all, can we prepare ourselves for a future that is only known to God?  Your life isn't going to look just like anyone else's, and we're awfully bad at guessing what He has in mind for us.  Expectations cause us to miss His unique plan for each of our lives - we grow in our faith when we trust Him through the things He does that we don't expect.
  • The pros of being actively involved in our siblings' lives (the dynamic differences in having older siblings/younger siblings/or both).
  • When the child becomes the teacher.  Sometimes the pre-supposed roles flip, and you are the student in learning a lot more than you think.

2) What it takes to be a sister
  • It's an everyday choice. (Take the manna as it comes...)
  • You don't have to be perfect. Don't play the comparison game, just look forward, forgetting what's behind.
  • Be what you want to see in them/walk your talk
  • Are you reading the Words of God and keeping communication with Him open throughout the day? Are we trying to love our siblings without being filled up with His love? We can do nothing without Him!
  • Becoming the hands and feet of Jesus - taking on His mind, His perspective. Jesus was an expert at looking at a sinner and seeing right through what man tends to see (the sin, the things that annoy us, the weaknesses) to what God meant us to be and what He is recreating us to be (holy, righteous, whole, with deep, inherent need of love, affection and security). Seeing past the weaknesses of our siblings to their true needs, and seeking to meet them more than having our needs met. Dutch guy quote in "What's So Amazing About Grace" by Phillip Yancey.
  • The importance of complete humility/honesty and respect in relationships
  • Do you want to show love to your older brothers and sisters, but don't know how? Pray for them! Best ways to pray for older siblings (prayer in Col. 1): strong sense of purpose, obedience to God's call in their lives, faithfulness to seek God, growth in fruit of the spirit, spiritual wisdom, and devotion/love for the things of God. Prayer is going to battle for the spiritual lives of our siblings; it's one of the most loving things we can do for them!
  • Younger siblings: not taking the place of parents OR God; taking the time to look in their eyes and try to see things from their level.  Remember what it felt like to be a child. Pray for tender hearts that "soak up" the truth they hear (at home or elsewhere), good habits such as reading Bible and praying to form, 


3) Distractions from being the sister God calls us to be
  • Your own social life
  • What the world makes you believe you need to be doing with your life (Who are we really trying to please??)  Running after worldly success vs. finding fulfillment in pleasing the Lord.
  • "I'm a pretty good sister."  Getting stuck in stagnant waters.  Having an attitude of continuously asking for God's opinion/having our minds renewed wherever we are (whether we think we're doing a good job or not). 
  • "I'm not the sister I need to be." (this is selfish, too) Dwelling incessantly on our failures or that "we are not where we need to be yet" will not help us move closer to being the kind of sisters we need to be. Speaking from our experience, worrying about our "un-Christlikeness" is actually often a trap Satan uses to keep us feeling defeated and helplessly languishing. We need to focus instead on Christ and His power to bring us closer to Him and make us more obedient to His calling. Forgetting what's behind, we need to keep moving with joyful enthusiasm towards the goal!


4) Conclusion
  • Biblical examples of ways you can make an effort to invest in the lives of your siblings (Proverbs 14)
  • Hebrews 3 - We have today.  Not becoming heard-hearted with the place God has us in, but taking advantage of it and thanking Him for it.



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