a Heart's Ramblings.

"I urge you, brother, to watch out for those who cause divisions and put obstacles in your way that are contrary to the teaching you have learned. Keep away from them. For such people are not serving our Lord Christ, but their own appetites." (Rom. 16:17, 18) How's my appetite?   Am I hungry for His Word, thirsting for time in His presence?? Desiring "meaty" teaching, and ready to eat what He puts before me?  I don't want to be one of "those who cause divisions" or one who is a walking obstacle for others beside me in the road of life... simply because of my change of appetite. Hungry for the world, and the things of it. Desiring to please myself, in place of the Lord.  Jesus, make me a JOY to be around because of what you are in me!  Don't let me fall into a place where others must "keep away from" because of my short-fallings, so that they may keep from the temptation of doing the same.  Be the constant change I need in my life...

Mmmm.  I love home. It really is the sweetest place to be. Or I guess the sweetest place to... well, be in heart I suppose. Cause it's not the house I love (as much I do so love what we've created here)... but more so the spirit of honesty and being so real. The way your heart, it's motives and desires, wishes and dreams, it's failures, its filth - it's all in the open in such a raw way. Yet in a good way. Home - or being in the close circle of family - always has a nice little tendency to bring me back to what's true and really important. The story-times, and carrying little sisters to bed to tuck them in or pray with them. The 'goodnights' resounding along the hallway, and down the stairs as everyone climbs to their own beds. It's family, and I love it. I've felt such a peace today. About everything. I guess I've been in a place a lot lately where I'm just tired of having to grow up. Sound pretty lame, doesn't it?? It does to me, ...

I was reading the newest KBR forum article earlier, and came across a sentence that got me thinking.  And was journal-worthy, obviously. ;-)  The guest writer was writing about Thanksgiving, as it's coming up later this month, and how thanksgiving should be a part of our every day.  About choosing to be thankful and letting God know about it, whether the feelings are there or not.  And then, " through thanksgiving, we are choosing to see God's hand in our everyday life .   The excited, upturned face of a child, the crunch of crimson and gold leaves under feet, the breaths we take each moment; all of these are windows to see the LORD. This is His Handiwork, His Creation. When we notice these things with thankful hearts, we are choosing to see Him. "    Isn't that good?  It pleases the Lord when we notice all the good things He's placed around us, and choosing thankfulness is choosing to see Him.  Pride, or not wanting to acknowledge and honor ...

Thinking about my example lately. Specifically my example as the "older girl" that I often forget I am. The closer I get to graduating... well, the farther and farther I finally start to realize I'm getting from the innocence of childhood forever - basically, I starts to hit me that instead of always wishing I was ' just one year older' , I actually want to stay put. Right where I am (in fact, getting to be a little younger again wouldn't hurt, right?). But life doesn't go that way, does it?? When I look at my life, I don't see much that someone would want to imitate. First of all, that convicts me! My life SHOULD exemplify Christ, and if it doesn't? Then my relationship with Him needs some attention! But secondly, that's when I have to lay it all in God's hands, knowing that when I'm following Him with each day He gives me, He'll take care of the rest. That if I surrender my heart into His hands, He'll take it over and make use...

My, has Nana been a handful these past few months! But, oh, the memories I feel we shall all have (that we otherwise wouldn't) now that she's been here! I really think that this is going to continue to teach us so much... reality really seemed to butt into her this last week, and it's affected not only her own demeanor but that of the entire house. Through it all, the Lord has been reminding me that, no - Anna, no, you don't always know how to simply love . My life should be different from others because of the love in my heart, and my life has definitely needed more of it... as God is showing me! Showing me how to love Nana, and how to keep a heart of compassion, and the heart of gladness and servitude towards her and her needs. How to love Mama, as she struggles with not only the everyday needs of her household and homeschooling her handful of children, but her own mother's health issues - of all times, cancer! - and the strain on her and Nana's relationship b...

Thinking this morning about my reading in Romans... God's law, the law of sin, and how you can be a slave to both of them. As I was pondering God's law, though, I realized it's really nature's law too. Because God isn't just a belief, it's reality. It's life. It's not just a way of thinking about nature, but a part of it. The two are inseparable. God's grace is a different thing though. It's not "just a part of nature". It's a highway God gives us as a way out of nature, out of decay, out of self (because it is now decay of nature =) - something that will pull us out of the misery we've created for ourselves since we pulled away from God. God didn't create death and the fires of hell - it's the way we've chosen for ourselves because of our sin. In fact, if the world had continued to go as He had originally planned it - we'd still probably be in the Garden of Eden. And yet, there are so many who can't ac...

This was good for me to read today... Advice for living life at home as an adult? This can be a great thing or it can be a horrible thing. What's really unfortunate about the whole topic is that there is this crowd of homeschoolers out there that has almost ruined the reputation of us "still-at-home-after-highschool" ers. When I say ruined our reputation, I mean ruined the way people as a whole think about young people living at home/not going away to the typical 4yr degree, secular college deal. They've almost ruined it because there is a large number of graduated girls (and guys, but we're just talking about the girls here so I won't get started on the guy problem) who do nothing but wash laundry, make dinner, and browse the web. Now, I'm not saying those things are bad. (I do each of them!) But if that's all you're doing there is a serious problem. I've seen way too many girls who have done that. You will look back year...

How You Live. It's a song I used to love to listen to when I was young, and just happened upon it again months ago. Doesn't have the best theology, but hey? Didn't I say I was young? It still rings true just as much as it did before, anyway. Take time to watch a sunrise out your bedroom window. Wear your favorite dress, and use your best dishes. Make big messes and wishes... In short, THIS LIFE is short. I need to take advantage of the little time that I have here. Use it. I'll be remembered for how I lived, not all the silly little accomplishments that I think are important right now.  I need to enjoy living, but also give of myself.  Spread the love around. Wear my favorite clothes and use my best dishes, but be okay with it when that favorite dress gets an oil stain from cooking dinner, and those perfect dishes shatter when they drop from little chubby hands trying to help get dinner on the table. Get the radio out, set in the middle of the room. Crank the volume...

Ah. Don't you love the feeling of a fresh new start? That's how I feel right now as I type in the very first words of this new journal-of-sorts of mine. A new beginning. Of course, I start waaay too many journals and never continue on with them... but this one, I hope, will be a little easier to keep up with.  My reasons, you ask?  1) It's stored online (can be accessed on any computer, can't ever be accidentally lost/deleted), no size limit. (hooray for unlimited space!)  2) I can start posting PICTURES of daily life (double hooray for unlimited space!): One of the things I've always wanted to incorporate into journaling as that is where my heart is, but I've never been able to figure out how to do that in an efficient way. This should make it much, much easier. =)  3) Okay, okay. YES. this is a little more fun than a plain and sorry Word document. I'm an honest person, right?? 4) This is much more organized than my other attempts. Dated posts and al...